There is a new friend in the forest. She lives in a village too far away to walk to, in a little cottage. She likes to cook and notices the little things as she walks through the landscape. We haven’t met personally, but she seems very nice and, like many of us, has a few mysteries in her story she is trying to uncover. Her name is Sonya and her digital home is here:http://impressionalmagic.com. I wrote her a letter because I love pen pals and I am hoping we can be. Have you ever had one?
Dear Sonya, October 21
I went into town today. It was on the quiet side, which surprised me. I bought a few apples and thought of you, as I know you love to bake apple pies this time of year. There was a cat sitting in a doorway and when I went over to it, it said ‘hello’ and let me scratch its head. I don’t know if I told you that I lost my kitty and miss her terribly. I wish you could have met her. Her name was Aurora de la Chance, my Aurora Borealis of the Second Chance. We rescued her. She rescued us. Let’s be honest.
I hope this note finds you well. Maybe we can have coffee or tea sometime, and sit under the trees and watch the leaves fall and feel the wind in our hair…
Yes, I know you are scared. It’s ok. But look back. There is a lifetime of being afraid. It has kept you safe, buy you have not experienced all that you’ve wanted. You have missed out. Plain & simple.
I can’t always be in the place of giving. I need to take, take time
I need help
I need a break
I need love
I need courage
I can’t always give
I need attention. I need to give myself attention. I hug myself with attention.
Hi.
You have beautiful ideas. You make such good art. You are capable. Feel into your energy. Keep having fun. Yes, you can do this. It’s going to be more amazing than you ever thought.
VPH Design Part Three: My Surface Pattern Design Guide.
I love Christmas. I love the lights and shiny ornaments when they hang on the tree. I love it so much that I have had a little pink Christmas tree in my studio forever. I keep it up all year and it has my favorite ornaments from Old Fashioned Christmas, I buy one every year at my favorite store, Drees, in Olympia. I have candy and ice cream ornaments, shiny pine cones, a rooster, a purse. And more. Yes, I posted this pic yet again. I love my little tree so much:
Little Pink Christmas tree in my window, up all year! 2020
As I worked with my coach, Jeanetta, (see my previous post here), she had me create Mood Boards. Before my first meeting with her, I again, invested in myself, and bought Photoshop. I know it fairly well, but it had been some years since I used it regularly. I highly recommend investing in yourself, too, and get the yearly subscription. Adobe Lightroom is fantastic. I did not buy Adobe Illustrator, but did use the trial version and I can see why people like it. Photoshop has mood boards, too, so I stayed with that.
First ever mood board, Sweets. 2020
Having never made a mood board before, I found it quite challenging. I learned a few things: I don’t need to be so literal with the inspiration. I actually added two of my paintings into the board, which I did not need to do, I can choose furniture, nature, or really anything that would give the “mood” of what I am going for, and next time, I will work on a story and pick descriptive words to go with the “mood”; like happy, playful, fun, cheery, etc. I was concentrating so hard on the actual making of the board, I got a bit lost. All in all, though, it was fun to make and I can’t wait to make another one. I’ll just keep learning!
Here are the four motifs/icons/paintings I made for my first design, all in watercolor, inspired by the ornaments on my little pink Christmas tree:
Ice cream. 2020Cupcake. 2020Swirl pop. Actual lollipop I can’t bring myself to eat. 2020No reference, Fantasy lollipop in red with hearts. 2020
I took pictures with my smart phone because I am currently without a scanner or printer. I played around with the icons in Photoshop; copying, rotating, etc. I couldn’t think of anything to do besides these tiles, which I thought were pretty cool:
Tiles of from my paintings in Photoshop 2020
I added hearts and stars. And cherries and then I didn’t know what else to do with them. I was ready for more help in our second session.
Jeanetta used the “share screen” option and I was able to watch her as she played around with the file in Photoshop. It was so cool! She suggesting “brightening up” the colors, as my photos were dark and what a difference that made. She duplicated, recolored, and turned and mirrored the icons into options I never thought of. It was pure play! Below is one orientation she came up with that I really like:
Screenshot of Jeanetta’s guidance, rearranging my motifs in Photoshop
After another tutorial and tip sharing, she sent me on my way to practice for another week. This got me thinking about cake toppers and fun things that could be added to desserts. Jeanetta suggested I start saving images for more moodboards in one of my online accounts that I won’t mention and I won’t use anymore. (that’s a whole other blog post). Here is one image I just love:
Credit to Wilton.com
So I sketched and played with colored pencils. I drew and drew and I still felt stuck and frustrated. What was I doing wrong? Why was this so hard?
Next post: I’ll share some of the sketches, ideas, and struggles of the process as I rework the Sweets motif.
2020 could very well be the year we finally decide that white supremacy and fascism get their asses kicked out of our country. This website is a safe space for Everyone, except Fascists. Love, support, and real talk is welcome here!
White people, use me as a resource. I have been actively working on deconstructing my colonial mind and understanding my white privilege for a long time. I’m not perfect at it, but I will be glad to have candid conversations with you. And, if you are genuine and authentic in your own learning, I will be kind and patient with you. No one learns if they feel attacked. <3
VPH Design Part Two: My Surface Pattern Design Guide.
Along with my retirement plan, I have been studying and following people on social media that encourage investment in one’s self. What does that mean? For me, it means put some money into your interests and self. So, I watched someone online for about six months and then, I contacted her before the end of the year. She coaches artists and she has done the surface design pattern gig for 20 years. We had a phone call and agreed we would work together. The money agreement was a lot to me, but I had saved up and decided I was worth spending that money on myself. I also know that I need to pay people and show that support if I in turn, would like support. So, finally I was going to get the help I could not find all those decades ago. Her name is Jeanetta Gonzales, of Nett Designs, https://www.jeanettagonzales.com/.
Jeanetta had me answer questions and send some images before our first meeting. We met four times with email check ins. I was processing pretty heavily, so I needed more time in between our meetings, which she was super gracious about. She gave me so much information and resources that I am still working through them. She was encouraging and gave me great feedback as I worked on my first surface design collection (which is still in process). She assured me there is room for me in the design world. And, one of her tidbits was to find my process. I learned two things about myself during this time: 1) I am talented enough to keep going and 2) I was so excited about beginning my journey I knew I was following my North Star!
The time and support I got from Jeanetta launched me on my surface design path! It was invaluable to me and I am still reaping her knowledge and sharing. I hope you will consider supporting yourself by finding someone that can help you on your path, too. You deserve it. XO
The inspiration for my first design collection. 2020
Next post: The icons I created for my first design assignment
She is a very pretty girl. I think her life is perfect. But, it is not. She carries pain and wounds unseen by us. Disappointment sits beside her, gently whispering, “It doesn’t matter. It will never happen.” And she listens. She listens too much. And her heart breaks every day with every broken promise. So, the tears flow, down the crevices and dips of her cheeks, splashing on her hands and feet. And she is left with sorrow and glittered tears under her finger nails.
What now?
Sadness.
There is so much sadness. Tears and salt. Sniffles and streaks. The river begins in her eyes. It trickles at first. Then gains speed with her wails and weeping. The flood gates are opened and the rushing torrent knocks all around her off their feet. They are swept away by her sorrow. No one can stop it. The flood waters reach the highest point and no one is safe. It washes all of it away. There is nothing left…well, not nothing, just fish bait.
I put myself in them. I have to. To escape. Escape the life I have chosen. Because I want to be somewhere else, doing something else, other than where I am. I see this. I see myself not choosing the Present Moment.
I know.
Don’t judge me. Well, you will anyway, I don’t give two shits. These are places I have been and seen with my own eyes. I took pictures with my phone and camera. I sat and watched. I ate food. I experienced the traffic noise and the Parisian voices. I walked and walked and walked and got lost in the best possible way. I can escape whenever I need to in my paintings. I have to. Sometimes the Present Moment isn’t all it’s a cracked up to be.